The word 'worrying' comes from an old English word meaning to 'kill by strangulation' and that's how it feels. And stopping worrying can be hard - trying not to worry simply doesn't work.
As Mark Twain said: 'I've had a lot of worries in my life, most of which never happened'. Constant chronic worrying takes the very soul out of life, exhausts you and paralyzes your you - preventing you from actually solving problems.
The purpose of worry:
Worrying has a purpose but it's a limited one. It's one tool but not the only one. If a loved one has a heart problem but is piling on the salt, or if we smell burning from the car engine then worrying can be useful.
These types of worries should result in problem solving (encouraging lower salt consumption or taking the car to be checked out). But when you worry about stuff that just may be or you worry about things in the future that may or may not happen then you are over-using the tool of worrying to a self destructive degree.
And worrying often becomes a habit - some people even say they worry if they have nothing to worry about!
Worrying is the misuse of the imagination
Your imagination is nature's tool to get you envisaging better futures and new possibilities. Worrying is the misuse of this powerful tool. Worrying is effectively you making bad stuff up, believing it and feeling bad!
And worriers all think in the same way: in all or nothing, or black or white terms... 'This is going to be a total disaster, a catastrophe a complete nightmare, I will be totally ruined '
Stop worrying and start living
When you stop worrying you notice many things. Firstly you feel a lot better day-to-day and you achieve more things. Secondly you don't try to second guess the future - assuming bad stuff all the time - you relax with not knowing how things are going to turn out. Instead you assume that whatever happens you'll handle it. And thirdly, you'll have more fun!
When you stop worrying you can still be cautious and concerned but only about the stuff that you can actually influence.
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